A Tryst with Midnight
by AShimmeringNote
Summary: It has been seven years since the end of the service club, and yet Yukino cannot forget... So she seeks solace under the moonlit Tokyo midnight.


The Tryst with Midnight.

The lingering lights off the Tokyo city cast a faint glow on the midnight sky. The moon shone like an island of hope in a dark abysmal ocean.

And in silence, she sat, as her porcelain skin seemed to cast a glow of it's own.

She didn't remember how many years had passed since it became a habit; a ritual, to spend her sleepless nights on the terrace of her studio apartment, and yet it almost seemed like a drug, a medicine of sorts.

Her hair, disheveled, yet graceful, flowed like a brook, turbulent yet steady. A few strands caressed her face, as her cerulean eyes twinkled from within her dark tresses.

Her thoughts surrounded her, just like they did every night. Sometimes she wondered if sleep refused to possess her, almost as if something was whispering; asking her to think, to listen to herself, revolting against her attempts to ignore her own emotions.

She remembered the service club...it had been seven years, yet she thought of it every day.

She remembered the clumsy, airheaded, yet caring and kind Yuigahama. She remembered the cookies, the festival, the trip, the nights at her apartment...and the times they hugged and cried together.

And she remembered him. The fish eyed loner. The person she thought she would always despise. She hated his world view. She hated his laziness. She hated his self sacrificial attitude...and yet...

"Hikigaya kun...", She said as the wind carried her words away.

She didn't understand how she could hate so much about him, and fall in love with him at the same time.

Perhaps circumstances corrupted her emotions to an oxymoronic degree. Perhaps she was an immature high school girl. Perhaps she didn't know what her feelings were and was wrong about everything. Perhaps she was just another idiotic teenager.

She has grown and things have changed.

Yet, why has she been in love with him for the past seven years?

She didn't understand how she lost her sensibilities to the extent where she still couldn't let go of her high school romance.

She looked up at the stars. The faint stars that only she could ever see, as they shone through the dulled out lights of midnight Tokyo. Somehow the fact made her feel better. It was almost as if the stars sparkled just for her.

Things changed in her life for the worse. Her relationship with her family worsened, till she decided to move to a different city. She was still in contact, but in name only. After all, she didn't want to ruin her family name; it was the least she could do.

Her life revolved around work. After all, the mechanical proceedings did distract her from her loneliness. She preferred working as many hours as she could, taking on copious overtime, just so she could pass her days.

But as much as she exhausted herself, she couldn't run away from herself. Her insomnia seemed to be a manifestation of her inner turmoil commanding her, 'don't ignore me.'

The frost laced pre winter wind danced over her delicate frame, as it embraced her, as it sent tingles over her skin...and yet it seemed so warm.

After all, the cold wind was the only one that still embraced her.

She smiled bitterly at the thought. She didn't know how she had become so self indulgent as to pity herself. She always condemned the notion, and yet, here she was.

Things do fall in a full circle, humans are hypocrites by nature after all.

_Seems like something Hikigaya kun would say, _she thought_._

She wondered if she could do things differently. Perhaps there was a reality, a Schrödinger's universe, where Yukinoshita Yukino was happy.

She always tackled situations head on, and worked till either she found the solution...or rendered herself physically incapable to continue.

But now, in an area, infinitely outside her area of expertise, so enigmatic, fleeing out of her reach every time she seemed to grasp it, she was helpless.

She didn't understand herself. She believed she was strong enough to live through everything life could throw at her; and she was, yet it seemed to cost her everything she desired.

She listened to the wind. The wind seemed to hum Chopin's Second Nocturne. It was merely an illusion of the ambience, and yet it calmed her in ways she couldn't explain.

She believed that the service club would become one of the many times in her life she reminisced fondly.

Yet, she moved on. She never found any memories she could look back on.

The service club was the only time in her life that she was genuinely...content.

To her, the service club wasn't one of many good times...

It was the only one.

And today it was nothing but a torturous longing...A longing she couldn't curb, a desire that still seems to viscously imprison her sense of contentment.

She seeks the same feelings that she felt seven years ago, but in vain.

Because no matter what she sacrifices, she cannot have it back.


End file.
